Monday, June 16, 2008

A Promise Is A Promise

I am currently reading the book "Between Two Worlds" by Elizabeth Marquardt. It is a real look into the lives of the now adult children of divorce (of which I am one). At the same time I have just completed my 12th week of teaching on the Ten Commandments to our 3rd - 5th graders. Something has stuck with me from the joining of these two studies and I can not let it go.
When we as adults make a promise/commitment/covenant/pledge/vow, to love our spouse till death do us part that is HUGE. Not just to us but to our children. We adults seem to be able to justify the ending of a marriage (the breaking of a promise.)
All the while we are telling the children "this is just between mom and daddy" "it is not your fault" "we could never stop loving you." (I do believe there are times when divorce is appropriate, that is not what I am referring to here. To many times spouses just think life is cooler on the other side and they move on.)
Have we ever thought about how confusing that is to a child. We teach that God will never break a promise. We teach them to tell the truth and keep their word. We show them that we got married and made a promise but it's ok to break this one.
My thought, why wouldn't a child on some level begin thinking "if mom and dad can break a promise to each other then why wouldn't they break a promise to me." "Or if mom and dad can stop loving each other, then why couldn't they stop loving me?" Worse yet if my parents can break a promise to each other then why wouldn't God break a promise?
Parents, a promise is a promise and even if the marriage doesn't have fireworks anymore it is still the way that God designed families. One father, one mother and the children. Children will always become healthier adults when they come from a two parent home.
If you don't like your marriage right now CHANGE IT! You be the one to bring the fun back, you be the one to show affection first, you be the one to say I am sorry first. If you can put effort into leaving you can put effort into staying and improving.
This is your children's future and the generations to come you are dealing with not just your own. And they ARE worth the effort.

3 comments:

Mom of 1 said...

All I can say is WOW!!!!!!! That is powerful. Kept it coming

Brenda Grace Mason Young said...

PREACH IT!!! I am praying specifically for people right now...you hit it right on.

Larissa said...

WTG! Two thumbs up.